Ah, the nervous system — the inner wiring responsible for how we think, feel, and respond to the world. It regulates our stress responses (fight, flight, freeze), emotions, sleep, focus, memory, and even our sense of safety in relationships. When it’s out of balance, we can feel anxious, overwhelmed, disconnected, or exhausted.

‍As our understanding of it grows, so does our ability to heal.

Evidence shows that unhealthy relationships (especially narcissistic dynamics) negatively impact our nervous system. Many survivors of family dysfunction, antagonistic relationships, or other toxic dynamics often feel “on edge,” “frozen,” “shut down,” or “unsafe in their own body” long after the relationship ends. Since our nervous system is programmed to protect us, it naturally responds to chronic, unpredictable stress.

Your Nervous System Isn’t Designed for Narcissistic Abuse

Healthy relationships feel predictable and safe. This constant unpredictability of narcissistic relationships forces your nervous system into survival mode, activating fight, flight, freeze, or fawn responses on a loop.

Fight or Flight: Always “On”

During the highs and lows of narcissistic abuse, your body releases stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline. Over time, this can lead to:

• Hypervigilance (“waiting for the next explosion/walking on eggshells”)
• Anxiety and racing thoughts
• Trouble relaxing or sleeping
• Feeling overwhelmed by seemingly small tasks
• Chronic tension
• Digestive issues
• Sensory hypersensitivity
• Over time, your body will learn that connection = danger

Freeze and Fawn: When Your System Shuts Down

Freeze is a type of “shut down”. It is a nervous system response to a threat where the body and mind feel immobile or unable to act. Fawn on the other hand, is a survival response where a person pleases, appeases, or sacrifices their own needs to avoid conflict or stay safe (I give into what THEY need so I can remain SAFE).

These states are extremely common if you are recovering from narcissistic abuse. They are not personality traits, but rather neurobiological adaptations to chronic emotional threat. This can lead to:

• Avoidance of people (including close/intimate relationships) places, and things in general
• Emotional numbness
• People-pleasing
• Feeling disconnected from yourself
• Minimizing conflict
• Denial

Why You Feel Exhausted or “Not Like Yourself”

Survivors often say: “I don’t recognize who I became", “I was constantly walking on eggshells", “I feel dysregulated for hours after an argument".

These are examples of a nervous system struggling to return to baseline since the environment they are (or have been) in does not allow their body and mind to feel safe enough to meet their basic needs (emotional or otherwise). Narcissistic dynamics repeatedly disrupt our body’s ability to feel settled or grounded. How does one authentically thrive in that? Well, we can't. And your body is letting you know.

Healing IS Possible

Thankfully, the nervous system has incredible capacity to recover. With trauma + narcissistic abuse-informed therapy you can:

• Regulate your body’s stress responses
• Rebuild a sense of safety
• Restore trust in your intuition
• Reduce anxiety and chronic overwhelm
• Reconnect to your identity
• Live a fulfilling life that feels safe

If there's one thing a narcissistic individual can't take from you, it's your resilience and willingness to find yourself again.

Recovery isn’t just emotional, it’s physiological. 👉 Book a free 15-minute consultation to help get your nervous system out of survival mode and into safety.

As always, happy healing <3.